


No Pants

by JunkerFawkes



Series: Overwatch University AU [2]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Drunken Shenanigans, Nudity, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-31
Updated: 2016-07-31
Packaged: 2018-07-28 10:54:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7637356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JunkerFawkes/pseuds/JunkerFawkes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jamie has a fun nickname for Lena, but how did that come about? This is the untold story of how Tracer got her nickname 'No Pants'</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Pants

**Author's Note:**

> Part of my ongoing Overwatch University AU!

“Hurry it up Lucio, we're leaving in a bit!” Lena shouted. “You sure you're not coming along, James?” she glanced into Jamies room as she was stood in front of it.  
“Lena, I'm sick. I feel like me head's going to explode and I can't even breathe properly.” Jamie grumbled, wrapped in his blanket on his bed with a pile of books and his laptop running. “I'd be no fun at a party. Just- make sure Genji keeps his pants on, all right?”  
“I will!” Lena grinned, sticking up one thumb. “Shame though, It'll be just the three of us then, since Hana's off on a date with that guy.”

“You guys sure you don't want to borrow Sheila?” Jamie asked, pointing at the keys on his desk.  
“It's only a 15 minute walk, we'll be fine!” Genji said, joining Lena. “Lucio?”  
“Yeah yeah, I have to make sure I leave my bestie with some tea, at least.” Lucio muttered, coming in with a big mug of hot tea and a bowl of citrus smelling hot water.  
“Here you go Jamie. Be sure to drink enough! Call us if you get worse!” Lucio put down both things on Jamie's nightstand and then gave him a hug.  
“Don't hug me, Lu, you got a death wish?” Jamie sniffed. “I'm as contagious as the plague right now.” But despite his protest, he squeezed Lucio tightly. “Thanks, mate.”  
“You're welcome. I'll check up on you when we get back, all right? Get some rest!” Lucio smiled, releasing Jamie and turning to leave with Lena and Genji. 

They left, going on their way to the club where they'd agreed on. Halfway there, Genji finally sighed.  
“So when are you going to tell him you want his dick?”  
“Excuse me?” Lucio frowned, surprised.  
“I read you correctly, right? You want Jamie.” Genji smiled with a cheeky twinkle in his eyes.  
“W-well-” Lucio flushed, looking away.  
“You do! Oh my gosh! Why don't you just tell him?” Lena gasped.  
“Because, unlike some, I don't feel like risking our friendship with him in favour of having sex with him.” Lucio defended himself, glancing at Genji.  
“Fair enough.” Lena shrugged.  
“I still think you guys would be a great couple.” Genji mumbled. “But I suppose that's your business. My business is to get some ass tonight!” he cheered as the club came into view.  
“Just be careful, all right?” Lucio frowned. “I don't want to carry you home.”  
“I'll be fine, don't wait up for me tonight.” Genji smiled. “Have fun, though!”

Lena and Lucio sighed in unison as Genji made off to no doubt score for tonight, deciding to ignore him and instead enjoy their evening together. Or so Lucio thought. They had a drink before going to dance, Lucio taking a Melon Ball shot and Lena ordered a Margarita. She downed it rather quickly, maybe a bit too quickly, because when they got to the dancefloor, she was already slurring with her speech. 

“Lena are you all right?”  
“Yeahhh fffine.” Lena smiled. “I'm feeling top notchhh love!”  
“Oh dear. Lena, sit down for a second.” Lucio said, gently guiding her to a seat.  
“Why? I wanna dance!” Lena protested, but did obey Lucio's request.  
“I'll get you some water, stay right here, okay?” Lucio said, urging her to stay seated.  
“Sshure.” Lena nodded. Lucio rolled his eyes as he went to get a glass of water for her. That margarita might have hit her a little too hard. Perhaps she didn't eat enough beforehand? He got a cup of water for her and went back to where he left her, but she was nowhere to be found. Awesome. 

Lucio looked everywhere in the club, but she was nowhere to be found, not in the toilets, not upstairs, not out back not in the cellar and certainly nowhere on the dancefloor. Maybe Genji had seen her. Lucio sneaked past security and into the VIP part of the club, finding Genji at the bar. Not that he was much help. He had been drinking and was being chatted up by a man and a woman who were seemingly glued to him. 

“Genji!” Lucio called out, elbowing his way throught he crowd at the bar. “Genji, have you seen Lena?”  
“Yeah of course!” Genji chuckled. “She just had some shots with me!”  
“What?!” Lucio gasped.  
“What?”  
“You gave her shots? She was smashed off her ass!” Lucio exclaimed, exasparated.  
“I know right! Such a lightweight!” Genji laughed. “She left after that, though. Dunno where.”  
“Well, you're no help.” Lucio grumbled, turning around and leaving him to his fraternizing. He went back down and wondered what he should do. He couldn't leave Lena alone in this drunken state. Who knows what she'd do? He went out front, asking the security if they'd seen her leave, discribing her shortly. 

“-And she was wearing denim shorts!” Lucio finished.  
“Yeah, she was.” one of the security guards said, holding up said shorts. “She took them off, threw them at us and ran, shouting she was going to experience british freedom and that she didn't need pants.”

“Oh my god.”

Jamie coughed loudly. He didn't remember the last time he felt this badly. He had no energy to do anything, just holding the cup of tea even though it was empty, the warmth lingered. It was Lucio's favourite mug and he liked the fact he gave it to him to drink from, however silly it was. He nestled himself in his abundance of blankets wrapped around him, making himself comfortable. 

The sound of his phone broke the silence, and he considered not picking up, but when he saw it was Lucio, that option was soon discarded.  
“Yeah?” he asked, coughing as he picked up.  
“Oh, Jamie I'm sorry for calling, but I need your help. I lost Lena and Lena lost her pants! She's missing and I don't know where she is! Please, can you take your van and look for her around town?”

“Wait... what?” Jamie frowned, sick brain working hard to catch up.  
“I know it's literally been thirty minutes since we left but a lot has happened, okay?!” Lucio said, obviously stressed out.  
“Lu, calm down all right? Panicking won't help. I'll take Sheila and look around. What do you know? Which direction did she go?” Jamie groaned as he forced himself to get up, stepping into his shoes.  
“She yelled something about experiencing true british freedom and took of her pants then ran off I think in the direction of the highway. Please find her!” Lucio sounded so worried Jamie had no doubt he had no other choice than to phone him in this state. 

“I will, Lu. I have a vague idea of where she might be. You should come home, I'll take her back with me.” Jamie said, voice hoarse as he jerked a jacket over his shoulders.  
“You sure?” Lucio asked.  
“Yeah.” Jamie confirmed. “I'll call you when I've found her.”  
“Okay. Thanks Jamie.” Lucio sighed when he hung up. 

Jamie rushed to his van, driving off towards the highway. If Lena was really doing what he thought she was doing, she might be in real danger, but he didn't want to worry Lucio even more than necessary. Not before he knew if his suspicions were true.

They were. 

He remembered Lena talking about a movie she once saw where they all went running naked and drunk over the freeway. Now he wasn't sure which movie she meant but that was exactly what she was doing.

Running.  
Naked.  
Over the freeway.

“Oh my god.” Jamie mumbled as he drove up behind her, flashing his headlights and honking at her. 

“U wot love?!” Lena shouted. “You wanna go?!” she started jogging backwards, fists in the air.  
“Lena, get the fuck in the car!” Jamie called over the noise of the traffic coming by. He was barely doing 5 mph following Lena's drunken jog.  
“Oh hi James!” Lena grinned widely, waving. “Has the Aussie come to enjoy some British Freedom as well?!”  
“Australia's experienced 'British Freedom' long enough I reckon. Get in the car!” Jamie repeated.  
“Nah, I'm good!”

“You're leaving me no choice!” Jamie grunted as he stopped, alarm lights on and praying they wouldn't get from behind. He jumped out the car and made a small sprint to Lena, grabbing her around the waist and slinging her over his shoulder, sprinting back to the car and throwing her in the back seat, locking it from the outside. He let out a relieved sigh when he got up to speed and left the highway, Lena still shouting about how great Britain was. She seemed rather docile apart from that though. No attempts to escape or fight. 

“Hey Lu, it's me.” Jamie said, phone between his ear and shoulder as he was driving.  
“Oh, thank goodness. Did you-”  
“-God save the queen!”  
“-You found her!” Lucio smiled, relieved. “Are you both all right?”  
“Yeah we're coming back. Can you get some clothes for her?” Jamie asked, grinning. “Her pants are not the only thing she lost.”  
“Oh my goodness.” Lucio sighed. “I will. Come back safe, all right?”  
“Almost there, no worries!” Jamie said, hanging up to focus on driving again. 

“Hey James.” Lena said from the back. “I'm kinda cold.”  
“Of course you are, you're not wearing any clothes.” Jamie frowned. “What were you thinking?!”  
“I was just trying to have fun, man!” Lena moped.  
“You could have gotten yourself killed!” Jamie said it a little too loudly, aggrivating his throat, causing a loud coughing fit. Lena seemed to retreat a little, perhaps sobered up a bit by the whole experience. 

“Here.” Jamie wriggled himself out of his jacket and tossed it her way. It was oversized for him, let alone Lena, but at least that meant she was covered to her knees once she zipped it up. Lena was quiet the rest of the ride, coming along obediently to his room, where Lucio was waiting. 

“Thank goodness, where did you find her?!” Lucio jumped up when they entered.  
“Running over the highway.” Jamie mumbled. This whole rescue had taken too much out of him.  
“What? Lena!” Lucio gasped. Lena sighed.  
“Yeah, I know.” she sighed, flopping down on Jamie's bed. “I'm sorry.”  
“Well, at least you're all right. Here, clothes.” Lucio handed her the clothes he'd gotten from her room.  
“I'm too tired to put them on.” Lena complained. She was definitely still drunk, just no longer loud and obnoxiously. She was crashing. Hard. She flopped onto her back and snuggled up in Jamie's blankets.

“Hey, Lena, come on!” Lucio said, shaking her. Too late, she was already gone.  
“It's fine Lu, leave her.” Jamie sighed. “I'll use Genji's bed. He's not going to be coming back tonight anyway.”  
“Right, that's probably a good idea. Sorry for calling, I didn't know what else to do.”  
“It's fine, Lu.” Jamie smiled, a tired but gentle smile. “You're a good friend, looking out for her like that.”  
“If I'm a good friend, what does that make you?” Lucio said, walking with Jamie to Genji's room.  
“A sick friend.” Jamie mumbled. “Get it? Sick in both senses of the word.” he made finger guns at Lucio, who rolled his eyes. 

“Just go to sleep.” Lucio shook his head, unable to hold back a smile.  
“Yeah. Will do. No problem.” Jamie muttered, getting in Genji's bed and curling up. “'Night.”  
“Goodnight.” Lucio lingered a small second, fond smile on his face when he watched Jamie cuddle up to a pillow before he turned off the lights and closed the door behind him. Maybe one day he'd be brave enough to tell Jamie how he felt. 

Maybe one day.


End file.
